


Not in this Lifetime

by A8INNN



Category: SB19 (Band)
Genre: M/M, SB19 ATIN STELLJUN
Language: Filipino
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-31
Updated: 2020-08-31
Packaged: 2021-03-07 00:42:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,760
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26208106
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/A8INNN/pseuds/A8INNN
Summary: If is the end, I want you to know that I love you. I love you, Sejun. My love is for you until the end.Maybe we meet but we are not meant to be, Not in this lifetime. Maybe in Another Life i would be your man. -Stellvester Ajero
Relationships: Friends - Relationship
Comments: 6
Kudos: 4





	Not in this Lifetime

**Author's Note:**

  * For [sb19](https://archiveofourown.org/users/sb19/gifts).



Disclaimer; this story is an alternate universe one shot + sorry for the typos and grammatical error.

do not plagiarize and follow me on wattpad: A8INNN

\---  
Not in this Lifetime AU

I look myself in the mirror while fixing my suit for today's wedding, i can't help but to smile. Today is the day. I glance on the mirror again and i guess i'm perfectly fine going to the church.

As i walked inside of the big church, i can't help but memories are rushing to my mind, remembering how we used to laugh and eat together, holding my hands on interviews, practicing vocals at the dorm, playing instruments while waiting the for others, waking up early in the morning just to cook breakfast, helping me while i'm in pain during live performance. Nandyan ka palagi para sakin. 

"Stell, i love you. My friend." he said while smiling brightly on the interview, I smiled back at him and saying I love you too. That memory was the best thing i can remember.

Ang daming tao sa loob ng simbahan at mga nakasuot ng magarbong damit pang kasal, napangiti ulit ako. I can see lots of friends, family and some of our fans are invited too. What a lovely view.

Sumigaw ang announcer na nandyan na ang groom, nagpalakpakan ang lahat pagkapasok niya ng pintuan. I found myself smiling widely as I see him wearing a black suit and slowly walking on aisle. When our eyes met, he smiled at me brightly and genuine. I can even hear my heart beating so loudly, He's handsome.

I adjusted my tie without taking my eyes of him. The suit was perfectly made for him, nakangiti siya habang mabagal na naglalakad papalapit sa altar at kita sa kanya ang galak dahil ikakasal na siya. The long wait is finally over. 

Binati niya muna ang mga bisita at nagpasalamat sa pagpunta sa kasal, My heart keeps on pounding na parang matatanggal na sa dibdib ko. 

I love him, I really do. He's my first love.

Hindi ko alam na masaya palang magmahal nang taong malapit sayo at nandyan para sayo. Sasamahan at dadamayan ka sa lahat ng oras at mag aalala sayo pag nasaktan ka. Kasama mo sa mga kalokohan at sa mga bagay na kayo lang ang nagkakaintindihan.

I love him, I love John Paulo Nase.  
I love Sejun. I love everything about him. His flaws, even his mistake i can accept it because i love him so damn much. 

He was my best person and best friend, meeting him in 2016 was the best thing ever happened to me. Finally naglakad siya papunta sakin. "Dre, I love you--," sabi niya sakin habang yakap ako. "My bestfriend and my... best man." pinakawalan niya ko sa mga bisig niya. It was his wedding day today pero hindi ako ang ikakasal sa kanya. 

Seeing him marrying someone pains me alot me but the worse is i'm the wedding singer on his wedding. 

"Thanks for inviting me." i smiled painfully. "Wala 'yun, Ikaw pa bestfriend kita." BEST. FRIEND. he said with full of joy while glancing at the door of the church. He's waiting for her. "I'm so nervous." he said. "You'll be fine." while patting his shoulder, i smiled sadly because he was not looking at me.

The wedding bells keep on ringing as the bride finally arrived on the church hall, wearing a long white gown that hugged her body perfectly with vail her head. Pinwesto ni Sejun ang kanyang sarili malapit sa altar habang masayang nakatingin sa babaeng matagal na niyang pinaka aantay, "Finally." narinig niyang sabi ni Sejun. Finally, you can marry someone you really love. 

He can feel something on his chest. A pang of pain and jealousy. I'm hurting but no one knows how i feel. Its suffocating.

When Sejun's bride finally reached him and departed by her father, kita sa mata at ngiti nito kung gaano siya kasaya. The woman widely smiled at him as he smiled back, the woman says "Thank you, Stell." and he nodded. Thank you too. Please take care of Sejun. 

Sejun and his woman held and embrace each others arm and saying i love you's, as they faced the priest and saying each others i do's and vows. I painfully smile as i held the microphone on my hands, he wants me to sing the song he requested, i closed my eyes and singing my hearts out.

🎶 Sir, I'm a bit nervous  
'Bout being here today  
Still not real sure what I'm going to say  
So bear with me please 

It was summer but the air feels so cold, Sejun asked me if i can meet him dahil may sasabihin daw siyang importante sakin. Maybe it's my time to confess my love for him, I wear something nice and comportable. He texted me the place where we can meet each other, as i arrived the destination, i'm so excited while holding a small velvet box on my hand. I saw him walking towards to my direction, He's so handsome as ever, anything he wear perfectly suits him. He waved his hands at me, i smiled at him.

"Stell, may sasabihin ako sayo." he said excitedly but nervous. "Ako din, Sejun." masayang sabi ko sa kanya.

"Ano sasabihin mo?" tanong niya. 

"Ikaw muna." sabi ko pabalik.

"Sabay nalang tayo." sabi niya. Napagpasiyahan nalang namin na sabay sabihin.

"1... 2... 3..." i counted while holding the velvet box tightly.

"Ikakasal na ko---" he said happily. 

"Mahal---" i paused as i hear what he say.

Bigla kong nanlamig sa sinabi niya.

"Mahal ang alin?" nagtatakang sabi niya.

"Ah. Wala may binili kasi kong singsing, Mahal siya." ipinakita ko sa kanya ang velvet na hawak ko. 

"Para kanino mo naman ibibigay 'yan?" curious na pagkakasabi niya. The ring that i want to put on you.

"Wala. May iba na siya eh," i give him a half smile "Ikakasal kana pala, who is the lucky girl?" tanong ko sa kanya.

"My first love," he said happily and brightly. His smile gives me pain inside of my heart para kong kakapusin ng hininga. 

My only hope suddenly dissapeared.

🎶 If I take up too much of your time  
See in this box is a ring for your oldest  
She's my everything and all that I know is  
It would be such a relief if I knew that we were on the same side  
'Cause very soon I'm hoping that I...

"Can i ask a request?" I nodded.

"Sure." sabi ko sa kanya.

"Can you be my wedding singer? Please." he said with pleading eyes. Cute.

"Sure. I can be," I can be your man. I grant his request. 

"Nice. Please sing, Marry your daughter on my wedding day." i feel some sort of pain and i could'nt explain it. 

🎶 Can marry your daughter  
And make her my wife  
I want her to be the only girl that I'll love for the rest of my life  
And give her the best of me 'til the day that I die, yeah

I'm gonna marry your princess  
And make her my queen  
She'll be the most beautiful bride that I've ever seen

I can't wait to smile  
When she walks down the aisle  
On the arm of her father  
On the day that I marry your daughter 🎶

As I open my eyes, I see them smiling while Sejun give his wife a peck on her lips. Sejun look at me with contentment on his eyes saying he finally found his love and never ask for more.

They both smiled at me while enjoying the song they requested. Seeing them happy with each others arms become poison that can kill me. 

I wish was the one he marry, If i confess early would it me? Will he love me? He was my man but he love someone else.  
Even if the world change, I'm always here for you even your not for me.

I wish i was on her position, wearing suits and marry each other and proud being Sejun's husband.

The song ended perfectly and all of the guest clapped for the wonderful performance. As the wedding ended, both of them separated for a while to greet their friends and family. I watched them laughing and smiling, i felt sick. Sick of being not chosen, sick of being left behind. If i was her, will you choose me, Sejun? 

Sabi sa isang kanta, pag ibig ko ay isang hangin na hindi mo madarama at kahit hindi man ako para sayo puso'y di magbabago. You're the one i love but i will say goodbye.

So many 'if's' in my head. I hope that she love you as i do. If it was me holding your hand, If it was me making you smile and laugh, If it was me. Only me.

I already imagine my life being with you, pag gising sa umaga ikaw agad ang una kong makikita, kasama kong kumain at kumanta. It was perfect but i'm imperfectly yours. Im yours but your not mine.

Bakit ba kasi tayo pinagtagpo kung hindi naman tinadhana.

I glanced at them one last time, pulling out the ring in the velvet box for Sejun, I wish i can put this on you. I walked away and found myself in front of a fountain beside of the church. My tears rapidly falling from eyes. I'm hurting, I can't breath. Napailing nalang ako bakit ba ko umiiyak. Hindi naman babalik nang luha ko ang katotohanang kasal na siya. Kasal na si Sejun, hindi sakin pero sa iba. 

I clenched my fist while holding the ring and carelessly throw it to the fountain. Its already end. I smiled bitterly, If someone found the ring in the fountain please put it to the someone you really love and going to end with. I wish you happiness, please take care the ring for me. 

I looked at the church. Please make them last forever and wish them happiness. My love already end here.

If is the end, I want you to know that I love you. I love you, Sejun. My love is for you until the end. 

Maybe we meet but we are not meant to be, Not in this lifetime. Maybe in Another Life i would be your man. 

END.

\----

try to play Stell's cover of 'marry your daughter'

https://twitter.com/stellajero_/status/1299348927007789058?s=19

NOTE: 

1\. THIS STORY IS ALTERNATE UNIVERSE ONLY, PURELY FICTION AND IMAGINE OF THE AUTHOR.

2\. SORRY FOR MY BAD GRAMMAR.

\----

AVAHRY/A8INNN 2020


End file.
